What if...?

Why's so hard to make decisions? I mean, if you think about it, it's not SUCH a big deal. You have to choose between two things. And if you screw up...Well, bad luck it is, but surely there will be a way to fix it. Yep... That's a very objective way to see it. I think that making decisions is like a pain in the ass. Not easy at all.
I think the most scaring thing is that you never know what will happen AFTER choosing and what will you loose if you choose badly, you never know what's on the other side. There's the title of this text: What if? What if you had chosen another thing? Did I make the right choise? Things would be better or worse? I would be happier or sadder? It might be an ass pain, but those questions that you'll never be able to answer make you stronger.
Althoght, even when you don't want to choose, you have to.

Dear Caroline

So, what if I told you I could never live without you? It sounds kinda weird, I know, but it's the whole truth. What if someone knocks on my door one morning and tells me you're not here anymore, that you're... gone? I wouldn't really know what to do. As you were telling me the other day, I don't feel like a best friend of yours, I feel more like your sister, someone you can even tell the most embarassing thing and laugh about it (and you know exactly what I mean) ; someone you can call at 3.00 AM because you think your little world is falling apart, or someone you can tell everything to, because you know he will be there, every minute and every second of your life. Well ok, this stuff is turning really boring, I know. But you know how I feel about our friendship, how I feel about you, although you may be a little bit stubborn sometimes because you don't understand some things about yourself, some things you really are and you don't want to accept. I cannot figure out the idea of you thinking you're... I don't know, horrible? Anyway, let's not talk about that one more time because you know I think it too, but it's different in my case.
I will never forget all the times we spent together, because when I'm with you it's like, I don't know... I'm happy no matter what happens around me. Around us, actually. You're a wonderful person and you know it, right? (Oops, in fact, you don't. Why am I asking that? Hahaha -guarda, risa americana-). Let's make it easy, I feel like I will always count on you if I need someone to talk to, a shoulder to cry on. Someone it's impossible not to think about when you're sad, because you make me happy with your laughs and smiles and all that little things that make you unforgettable. I've been very lucky meeting you, meeting a person like you. Thank you for everything, I'm not going to make this longer because you know it's difficult to write like this (la capa de dai te está escribiendo en inglés y tardé siglos hahaha, you know it). 

I love you so much! Remember that I love you (does it ring a bell to you?).